24 Hours in the Grapevine Mills Mall

It happened. You’re trapped in a mall for 24 hours. Don’t ask how this happened, you know how. But, lucky for you, it’s not just any mall — it’s Grapevine Mills. A cool, underrated shopping mall north of Dallas and Fort Worth. Grapevine Mills has movie theaters, arcades, putt putt, escape rooms, a beautifully specific food court, and a Meow Wolf. This is the future mall founders had in mind back in the 1700s when they created the first indoor shopping centers. There’s so much to do and honestly, will 24 hours even be enough? Is there a way to be trapped longer?

Side note: Are malls not portals themselves? Every mall is a Meow Wolf if you think about it.

Continuing on… 

I’m here to guide you through this weird little day fate has chosen you to have — surely the best 24 hours of your life — and don’t worry, I’ve broken up your stay into five-hour installations.

Let’s go.

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Hours 1-5 (Chapter I: Chaos)

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Seven AM. Waking up in the morning. Gotta be fresh. Gotta go to the mall. 

You’ve arrived. It’s up to you if this 24 hour experience is voluntary or not, but regardless, you are here and have twenty-four hours ahead of you. What do you do first? The food court, duh.

It’s the staple of all malls. When you think “mall” you think food court. And there’s so many options at Grapevine Mills. There’s the classic Chili’s, the elusive Sonic, the rich, cultured Popeye’s. There’s gyros, pizza, Thai. So many delicious, savory, sweet choices. It’s a choose-your-own-adventure with beautiful sights to see as you eat– a feat that is just as important. As you devour your tasty, tasty meal, you look around and see carousels, ear piercing stations, and a shoe-shining booth. A perfect meal with a perfect view. 10/10. Where’s the Michelin stars? Naturally, this adventure takes up one hour.

The day is still young. You’ve eaten and have just enough energy before your post-meal drowsiness hits. What else should you do at the mall? The greatest American pastime: shop! Thank you capitalism, thank you Instagram, and thank you early 2000s movies with shopping montage scenes! This mall has everything you need, and magically everything is your size. Don’t worry, sneakerheads, you’re covered too!

This takes 3.5 hours.

As you stow away your bags in a mysterious portal to your car? Hopefully? You smell it. WHiffffffff. Pumpkin, ginger, Japanese rose blossom, mahogany teakwood incense. There it is: An important mall staple, second only to the food court itself. Where would we be without them? What would our homes smell like? I shudder at the thought.

You spend a respectable 30 minutes here.

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Hours 6-10 (Chapter II: Reliving the Past)‍

Alright. It’s been five hours. Time seems fleeting but it is not. You’ve eaten and you’ve shopped. Surely there can’t be more to a mall? Right? Rong.

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Please gaze in awe with me at the beautiful multi-entertainment facility, Round 1. Bowling, arcade games, karaoke. You spend two hours at Round 1 reconnecting with your childhood self. The self you wish you could still be. The self who spent all day playing video games or running around outside. Dance Dance Revolution, Mario Kart, Donkey Kong. Friendship, laughter, food, beverages. It’s all here. Your childhood self meeting up with your current self over a Mario Kart race. Who will win? Who will play who? Are you a Toad or a Daisy? You dance over to the karaoke machine and sing the soundtrack to your youth. Once you’ve brought the house down with your spot-on-and-never-slightly-depressing rendition of Bohemian Rhapsody, you wind down and hit the bowling alley. You spend two hours at Round 1.

What’s next? More fun! You find the mini golf company, Lunar Golf and play putt putt. Not just any putt putt. Glow in the dark putt putt. Neon putt putt. It’s really cool, just don’t wear a dirty shirt, but that’s okay if you did because you just went shopping. Your dirty, clockable-under-black-light shirt is immediately swapped with a Gucci button-up from Sak’s. Thank you, Hours 1-5!

And after? MORE! FUN! You spot Legoland. These are the childhood hours. All your favorite childhood movies and shows in Lego form. Your childhood dream job of being an astronaut or a jedi — all in Lego form. And wow you still have all the money in the world. On top of that, there are rides in Legoland. You spend one hour here.

Next? Your favorite childhood pastime, your ocean phase, your marine biologist dreams reawakened. That’s right– there’s an aquarium in the mall. You spend time looking at the sharks, turtles, and jellyfish. So many ocean facts come rushing back. You walk through the aquarium tunnel and stand under a resting stingray. Life would be so much simpler if you were a sea creature in a mall aquarium whose only life tasks are to eat and be publicly beautiful. You spend two hours here.

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Hours 11-15 (Chapter III: Okay let me chill out)

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Okay. It’s been a lot. You need a break — to sit down and relax. To feel that indescribable feeling when the lights begin to dim, and you go somewhere you’ve never been before.

You guessed it. There’s an AMC movie theater in the mall, and don’t worry, the popcorn is delicious– and I’m very picky about movie theater popcorn. So for the next five hours what do you do? You watch movies. Tom Cruise is so proud of you.

Go see a space war movie. Watch a superhero flick. Support indie movies. See an international film. This AMC has it all! Five hours, two dazzling movies on the silver screen. Unwind, laugh, cry. Heartbreak does feel good here.

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Hours 16-20 (Chapter IV: Crashing)

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9 hours left…Is there more? There can’t possibly be more… 

:) There is.

You emerge from the theater a changed person, and your stomach grumbles. You have the munchies. The best kind of munchies. The “I guess I can eat” munchies. The “I have nothing else to do” munchies where you eat to pass time and find the greatest food to ever hit your taste buds. And that’s exactly what’s happening here. Let me tell you about the secret food spots in Grapevine Mills.

Kimu Sushi. Bomb. Bubble Tea Bliss boba. Delicious. Beef Jerky Outlet. YUM. And also, especially, the Rainforest Cafe. You spend an hour hopping from spot to spot, eating California rolls, Korean hot dogs, Caribbean shrimp, and other delicacies with locations in their title.

Next? Fashion montage part II– but instead of clothes-focused, it’s knick knack-focused! Get a cowboy hat at the Texas Collectibles store, buy $1 snacks at Daiso, get Pokemon figurines at Box Lunch, heck, hit up The B-12 Store too. You spend an hour shopping for knick knacks.

Up next is Peppa Pig World of Play. How could you not stop in? Peppa’s your girl. Explore Peppa’s house, shop at the supermarket. Peppa’s world has come to life and there’s so much to enjoy. You spend an hour here. 

Peppa’s bright, vibrant, whimsical energy is infectious, but you need to balance it out. You need some dark, brooding angst. Time to hit up Hot Topic and maybe Croc’s. Peruse the aisles for anime apparel, keep your hands warm with black, fingerless gloves, get flare pants with chains and studs, why not? No one else is in this mall with you. Shop your truth.

21 hours. It’s been 21 hours inside Grapevine Mills. It’s the final countdown. You’re getting sleepy and your vision is blurred but you can see the light — you’re so close. What do you do? You drag your body along the polished and definitely-not-gross mall floors looking for something to do. A disorienting frequency beckons your attention. You look up. M e o w  W o l f.

You get up and stumble inside. The Real Unreal? Jared? Lucius? Meow? Wolf? Welcome, traveler. You spend five hours immersing yourself in the story, looking at the art, sliding down the washing machines, playing the arcade games. Take photos and post them to your already exhausted Instagram story. Eat the cafe snacks, shop at the retail store. Get really unreal.

—----24 hours up—------

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Whoa.

You did it. You survived! 

I’m so proud of you.

You’re kicked out into the parking lot by unseen forces. You look back at the mall and smile, maybe even cry. You’ve just had the best 24 hours of your life. 

Thoughts of the Real Life you’re returning to flood in. You wish you could run back inside. Don’t worry. The mall will always be here whenever you need to escape and get back to your unreal life.

See you soon.

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